Least Expected Grief

The Twins and Legos

My twins Noah and Aniyah love to play legos. Well, Noah loves to build and Aniyah loves to knock them down. I was watching them play and I saw this masterful work at play. Picture this, you have a set number of legos to build something, let’s say a set of 120. When Noah used all 120 legos to build something it was beautiful, then Aniyah came along and gave Noah an idea to make it better but there were no more blocks. 

We All Have Choices To Make

Noah had a choice to make, he could either start all over with Aniyah’s idea or keep his same design. Well, she didn’t give him much choice and she knocked it down.  He cried for about 10 minutes because he wanted to keep what he had, and while he was crying, she proceeded to start building. He had been watching her the whole time and decided he liked where she was going, and although he was mad she had knocked his original design over, He was excited about this new design with the same number of legos. 

Rebuild Together

They built it together and they both had a huge grin on their face when they presented it to me. It was something that reflected both of them but is way more reliable and stronger than before. It was Noah who had to wrestle with change and came out on top after realizing the end result was worth it. It was Aniyah who chose to be the catalyst for Noah’s change even when it wasn’t requested. 

Least Expected Grief

Most times, grief comes when not requested and it’s up to us to choose with the same or fewer pieces to build something beautiful again, to pick up the set of pieces that are left, and chose, with a partner, to rebuild. Never alone, watching and crying along the way, we find the space to rebuild, we find the space to smile, we find the space to present what we’ve accomplished once we’re done and we have a new masterpiece.


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Sending Love and Freedom,

Olivia Myles

About the Author

Founder and CEO of Grief To Freedom, I’m your Grief to Freedom coach. I help grievers who carry grief in their lives and thus have lost a piece of themselves, feel better again.

Whether it is a death or other loss, they know they must continue to care for the people that are still alive in their lives, yet they long for a solution for themselves for the losses they have experienced that continue to plague them.

I help them honor themselves and discover their new direction. I guide them through the next steps to finding how to take care of the people in their lives who are alive, without feeling guilty or thinking that they can’t honor the loss they experienced.

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